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Home / Articles / Ask Amanda / Ask Amanda: What Happens If a Domestic Violence Victim Doesn't Show Up for Court?

Ask Amanda: What Happens If a Domestic Violence Victim Doesn't Show Up for Court?

It can be frightening to face an abuser in court, but it’s important, and sometimes required, to show up

  • By DomesticShelters.org
  • Sep 11, 2024
victim in domestic violence court

Q: My abuser has a criminal court date coming up. I’m supposed to show up as a witness to testify (he was arrested after beating me up in our home) but I’m feeling so nervous about the whole process. I know my abuser will stare daggers through me, and that alone is enough to keep me hiding in my house. What happens if I don’t show up? Will he go free? I feel like I’m in danger whether or not I go. 

This is a tough spot to be in as a survivor. I want to acknowledge that all of your feelings of fear are valid. You escaped abuse and now you have to go face the perpetrator in court and talk about what he did to you while he stares at you? That definitely falls under the umbrella of revictimization, and I wish there were another way to make sure this perpetrator could be held accountable.  

But until we reform our criminal justice system, in many cases, survivors of abuse do have to show up in court. In a felony criminal court case like it sounds like you’re describing, if you are subpoenaed to show up for court as a witness, you have to comply. A warrant may be issued for your arrest if you don't show up. 

If you do need to attend, a trained prosecutor should work with you to address your concerns and minimize your participation in the case. There may also be an alternate way for you to testify, such as virtually, so you do not have to actually be in the courtroom with the abuser. This will largely depend on what the judge prefers as well as the laws of your state. 

 If the right evidence is collected by trained law enforcement and prosecutors, you may not need to attend court at all. When the investigation is done correctly, the case does not have to be a he-said-she-said scenario.  Instead, the evidence presented will turn the focus on the acts of the abuser.

However, there isn’t always sufficient evidence in every domestic violence case. Derek Jacques, divorce attorney and principal owner of The Mitten Law Firm in Southgate, Michigan confirmed that you’re not alone in feeling fear at going to court. 

"It is not uncommon for a victim to file charges and then either refuse to show up for court hearings or even recant their accusations. Many times, this happens out of fear,” he says. “Fear not only of their abuser but also the unknown. Many times, the victim is totally reliant on the abuser for their financial stability or shelter, and the thought of not having those things can be terrifying.”

There is a chance the judge will grant a continuance if there is a general sense that the survivor was manipulated or coerced into not testifying, Jacques says.  A court can actually find an abuser loses the right to have the victim come to court if they find the abuser engaged in conduct designed to keep them from attending. This is often called “forfeiture by wrongdoing.”

“However, this depends heavily on the judge and their interpretation of the facts at hand,” says Jacques.

Has your ex-partner contacted you since your arrest? Has he threatened you? This is a common type of witness tampering abusers rely on to avoid charges. The other common tactic of coercion is when abusers promise that they’ve changed and only the survivor can help them get a fresh start. 

“Even if your abusive partner seems to show up with remorse and apologies. It’s important to stand in the truth of your experiences,” says Michellene Burke a divorce coach certified through One Mom’s Battle and an associate member of the American Bar Association specializing in family law. 

“Even if you are showing up with that fear, that anxiety, it’s valid. Even if you feel you have to show up a certain way, show up,” she urges and warns that the alternative is often more of history repeating itself. 

“Abusers will try to convince survivors to drop the charges in exchange for them getting custody of the kids, or some other promise, but instead, the abuse continues,” says Burke. 

There is a chance that if you don’t testify, the charges will be dropped against the abuser. This depends on what evidence the prosecution has besides your testimony. This may include other witnesses, forensic evidence, video surveillance, a 911 call recording or the defendant’s confession. If your testimony is the only evidence, it’s likely the State will drop the charges. 

I know it doesn’t seem fair that this burden of proof rests on your shoulders, but there’s an important point to consider—do you feel safer with your abusive partner out of jail or behind bars? Granted, I realize that even if you testify, it doesn’t guarantee the abuser will serve any jail time, but the abuser’s arrest and prosecution will likely stay on his record and show up on future background checks. 

Let’s say you decide to go and then, something comes up, such as an illness or car trouble, and you can’t get to court. Most courts will offer a postponement as long as you contact the prosecutor’s office right away, says Jacques. 

“Use all available contact methods—calls, emails, etc.—to ensure the message gets across. Judges do not look kindly on anyone that simply doesn't show up for a scheduled court date, whether they are a plaintiff or defendant."

Now, back to this fear aspect. Consider bringing a support person with you when you testify. This could be a friend or family member, or an advocate from your local domestic violence shelter. Reach out to a shelter near you and see if they offer such services (most do as long as they have enough staff). 

Prepare as much as possible. The more prepared you are, the less seeing an abusive partner can throw you off. Consider reading “Nine Ways to Prepare to Testify in Court” and “6 Tips for Facing an Abuser in Court.

Ensure that you have an order of protection before you testify, which means if the abuser contacts you before or after you testify, you can report him to law enforcement and it may affect his charges. 

Familiarize yourself with post-separation abuse tactics as well. There is a common misnomer that once a survivor escapes, domestic abuse stops. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. Make sure to take care of yourself and make a safety plan for your physical safety as well as your emotional well-being. You may also want to consider contacting the victim witness advocate at the prosecutor’s office who may also be able to help you with support and resources if abuse is ongoing.

Taking care of yourself should be a top priority right now, whatever that looks like. 

Have a question for Ask Amanda? Message us on FacebookTwitter or email AskAmanda@DomesticShelters.orgAsk Amanda is meant to offer helpful resources and information about domestic violence. If in crisis, please reach out to your nearest domestic violence shelter for the guidance of a trained advocate.

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